I had planned on writing this blog about a month ago, when I behaved in a not so nice way – acting entitled, you might say.

We were having a guest minister at church and because I’m used to sitting in the front, I had got a little upset that they had blocked off the front rows because they were supposedly taken, already. Well, I’m sad to say that I acted in a very ugly way, saying that I might even have to get ghetto up in church. Yeah…I said that…and in front of people. Well, someone in one of the middle rows told me there was a seat available. Kind of huffing and puffing, if you will, I walked to the seat, glazing at the front rows, wondering why there was still some seats without people in them. After sitting there for less than 5 minutes, some friends told me that there was a seat in the front row, so I jumped out of my seat and went to sit there, feeling all blessed and what not. Then it happened…

As praise and worship was going, I felt a conviction like no other. I think praise and worship was awesome, but I wouldn’t have known that. I felt guilty and ashamed at how I had just acted. How am I even going to be here, in the front row, lifting my hands and praising God, when some of those people behind me saw me act a fool?? I couldn’t take it any more. As soon as the music had ended, I went to tell the ushers that the front row seat I was in was available and went to watch the service from the overflow room. Service was amazing and I know if I wouldn’t have moved, it would not have been. I would’ve felt too much guilt to even hear what he was saying.

I was reminded of this same thing, yesterday, when we had a children’s church meeting and the leader addressed changing our team shirts, in which most people wanted to make sure they were not going to be the same orange that a lot of people have disliked so much. I admit…I was guilty of expressing my dislike of them, previously, but this time I knew she was changing them to white – which goes with everything – and still heard some people not happy with the change. And it made me think…who do we think we are?

Why do we feel this sense of entitlement, sometimes? It happens to all of us, at some point, I believe. In our churches, our workplaces, in our homes, our families, our marriages, our friendships. We think because we’ve been there for 5, 10 years, and we always sit there, that we deserve that seat. We’ve been on our jobs, with our team for so long, that we are entitled to the best cubicle or computer or desk with a view. We’ve been married to this person for so long and they are not doing what I think they should, to show me they deserve me, or I deserve better because I’m entitled to that…isn’t that what that marriage certificate and ring mean??

It’s really selfishness.

The definition of entitled says, ‘believing oneself to be inherently deserving of privileges or special treatment’. We feel entitled because we’re only thinking of ourselves. 1 Corinthians 10:24 says, “No one should seek their own good, but the good of others.” When we’re thinking that way, we have no room to think of only ourselves. We’re too busy thinking of others and how to be beneficial to someone else’s needs and in their life. Think about it, if people thought this way, I believe the world would be such a better place. Marriages would not fall apart because each is too busy thinking of the other person, just as they should be. People wouldn’t be so easily offended, thus, having happier relationships and workplaces and homes.

I know this is easier said and read, than done. But, is it really that difficult? I could’ve stayed in that front row seat at church and thought to myself the whole service, that I totally deserve this seat and the best experience. But there is no way I would have gotten the best experience with that attitude. And, isn’t that what we ultimately want…to live these happy and fulfilled lives, having great experiences in this life and with the people around us?

1 Timothy 6:17-19 (MSG) says, “Tell those rich in this world’s wealth to quit being so full of themselves and so obsessed with money, which is here today and gone tomorrow. Tell them to go after God, who piles on all the riches we could ever manage – to do good, to be rich in helping others, to be extravagantly generous. If they do that, they’ll build a treasury that will last, gaining life that is truly life.”

Though that scripture mentions riches and some of you may think you’re not rich, I would like to say that if you have a roof over your head, money to live – even if it’s not as much as you’d like, a family – or even just one person – that loves you, you are pretty rich. What are we doing with our riches? Not just with our wealth, per say, but our eyes that God gave us…are we seeing the beautiful family He has given us? Our hands…are we helping those in need? Our mouths – are we speaking words of life to the people we love and are around us or are we tearing down people, our relationships, and our marriages with the words we say? Are we feeling so entitled because of all the riches that we have, that we are missing all the blessing that we could be doing and living that abundant life?

I don’t want to do that anymore. I don’t want to be so caught up in self, that I miss out on the greatness of life, the truly abundant life that I can have.

The life that is truly meant for me…but not because of me expecting it, but because I am giving and living it.